Chorus:
Whoa, mule, whoa. Whoa mule I say.
I ain't got time to kiss you now, the mule has run away.
Now miss Mary take your seat. You better keep cool.
I ain't got time to kiss you now, I'm foolin' with this mule.
Chorus
If I had a needle and thread, as fine as I could sew
I sew little Betty to my shirt and down the road I'd go
Chorus
The hardest work I ever done was dig around a pine
The easiest work I ever done was love that gal of mine
Chorus
Whoa mule I tell you, whoa mule I holler
Tie a bow knot in the tail or he'll jump through the collar
Chorus
Just a handful of alternate verses:
Take your seat Miss Liza, Just you keep 'em cool.
I ain't got time to waltz with you, I'm dancing with this mule!
Used to live on a mountain, now I live in town
Boardin' at a big hotel, sparkin' all around
I went to kiss my gal last night, I thought I'd do it sneakin'
I missed her mouth and hit her nose and the doggone thing was leakin'
My gal's old man don't like me much — he's got a heart of flint.
Last night I saw him buy a gun, and I can take a hint.
I bought some biscuits for my dog and put 'em on the shelf.
Times got so hard I shot the dog and ate them up myself.
Mary had a little cat, It swallowed a ball of yarn.
When those little kittens came, They all had sweaters on.
We had a goat down on our farm, Who swallowed old tin cans.
And when those little goats was born, They came in Ford sedans.
We had a dog down on our farm, Wouldn't bark no how.
Then he swallowed my new Timex, So he's a watchdog now!
I went up on the mountain to get me a bottle of corn
Raccoon set his dog on me and the possum blowed his horn
You may ride the old gray horse, I will ride the roan
You may court your own true love, but leave my wife alone
Chorus and Verse:
| I | I | I | V |
| I | IV | V | I |