—Dave Macon
We decided to get married, my little girl and I
The day I bought the licence, I let my freedom fly
We walked up to the preacher, said yes to all he said
And if I had to do it again, I'd shoot myself instead
Chorus:
Oh, give me back my five dollars I paid for a wife
I was a fool to pay someone to sentence me for life
The first month she was sweet as a melon on the vine
I thought it was my lucky day when I asked her to be mine
She looked so doggone pretty she like to've took my breath
But when I saw my mother—in—law, I darn nigh choked to death
I took her to our home up east, I told her to see the sights
She'd come in about daylight, oh 'Where did you spend your nights?'
She bought out half the city, silk dresses and gold braid
I could have bought the Brooklyn bridge with all the bills I paid
So now, young men, stay single for married life's baloney
It would break a millionaire to pay her alimony
Oh, single men, stay single don't marry you a wife
A bachelor's life is heaven compared to married life
Verse and Chorus:
| I | I | I | V |
| V | V | V | I |